The pandemic gave me time to think, overthink and worry. It also gave me time to question. Who am I when removed from the world? I came to the conclusion that I was non-binary and in the safety of my home I experimented with how I presented. Drawing inspiration from female punks I settled on a bold look of tights, skirts and colourful beards. A fun look for the home office, but could I venture outside like this? What would the neighbours think? How would strangers react?
I’m fortunate that on my doorstep is the UK’s longest promenade. A place with views ranging from the hills of Cheshire, to the Liverpool waterfront, to the mountains of North Wales. Ships sail daily into the River Mersey, reminding us that we are a swirl of ideas both local and distant, in both time and space. We are not solid stone statues celebrating a fixed point in time. We are bags of mostly water, fluid and flowing and always growing. Lockdown, oddly, helped me grow and the promenade gave me a space where I felt comfortable enough to see how the world would react to updated me.
These photographs are an exploration of myself, and of what I saw as I walked along the prom in a skirt with a colourful beard. I felt lonely, and isolated because I never saw myself in the world. I would almost never bump into someone like me on my walks. But, I also felt safe because there was no-one here. No-one to judge or attack me. It was me and nature. Nature isn’t personal, it just is. I felt safe knowing that whatever nature threw at me was not because I wore a skirt.
